Yesterday, Bruce excitedly posted a picture of his Christmas present, and has been impatiently awaiting its assembly ever since. Unfortunately, while the box calls this a "Terrifying T-rex", it fails to mention that it really means "Terrifyingly difficult to fucking assemble". When we finally opened the box, we were greeted by a pile of dinosaur parts that would put the Hell Creek Formation itself to shame:
In case you just think Bruce has a tiny dining room table, here is a picture to give you a sense of scale. This is the T-Rex's tongue (just the goddamn tongue) in Bruce's hand (and for those of you who don't know, Bruce also has giant hands):
But something wasn't in the box: markers. Even with our staggering expertise, this was clearly too big of a job for crayons. Given that it was Christmas, this could have ended in tragedy, but thankfully, the godless heathens at the local 24 hour CVS were happy to sell us a 10-pack of Crayola markers at a reasonable price.
We quickly got to work...but got sidetracked for a bit when we realized what could be done with a partially completed dinosaur sculpture.
"Prior to posing for this picture, I was taking a nap on the couch and woke up with this fucking thing next to me, horse head-style."
Five hours later, the poor guy finally got a completed lower jaw, and our orange marker was on its last legs.
-- Bruce