And Speaking of Ducks...

When Danielle and I aren't coloring things, we really like to read about dinosaurs and watch totally grown-up TV shows about dinosaurs. Indeed, for a recent special occasion, Danielle got me the following card, clearly purchased in the sophisticated adults section of the card store:

"I really wish this card didn't provide so many inappropriate Photoshop opportunities."

The card came with something even more exciting: 15 capsules of GROW YOUR OWN DINOSAURS! Remember the things you used to beg your parents to buy? Surely, you would soon have your own rampaging carnosaurs who would eat all of your teachers and end homework forever. Too fucking bad they're just sponges! Suck it, kids.

Anyway, I naturally assumed that 15 years of new technology would have made them even better! But alas, it seems that the encapsulated sponge industry has only deteriorated over the last decade and a half. Because instead of 15 dinosaurs, I got this shitty menagerie:

"Dammit. These are only slightly more alive than Sea Monkeys."

For those not keeping score at home, we have 7 "dinosaurs", and 8 non-dinosaurs. Sure, you can be pedantic and point out that ducks are technically dinosaurs, but I can be equally pedantic and point out that plesiosaurs are not technically dinosaurs (such basic knowledge that I won't even provide a link). So at best, only 54% of the capsules were filled with dinosaurs, and that's only if you round up for .3 repeating, and who does that bullshit anyway?

So not getting our dinosaur fix from the capsules, we set out for the dollar store, and got something that will surely give us HOURS of dinosaur fun...

"Fuck your coloring book, this is a BOOK TO COLOR!"

...but that's for another post.

-- Bruce and [a few half-assed additions by] Danielle